So, we're doing chemistry in science at the moment which I totally don't get. I mean, I'm just saying, in my future as a journalist and travelling around the world at what point am I going to feel the need to balance a few chem equations? I hate chemistry so much. We already tried this last year, and I didn't get it then. I just thought, oh well, it's all over now. Wrong. It has surfaced again in Year Ten. I am yet to see it's value. I don't like it and I don't get it and I hate that other people are all: "ha ha, chem is so easy! I'm totally going to ace this test!"
And of course, my friend who I sit next to in chem absolutely loves it. I mean, she does not stop. Every lesson she goes on about how much she loves chemistry. I mean, geez, I love History but I don't exactly die of excitement over an essay on World War 2, now do I? And granted, maybe I would at least grasp the concept if I didn't spend my science classes thinking about how cool it would be if I could fly and if I had a pet spider monkey. But still. I am a humanities person. I like English and Literature and Music and History. Not maths and science and geography.
So anyway. Here I am, on a Saturday night, Googling (I turn to Google in my times of need) how to balance chemical equations. I found a helpful sight which helped quite a bit so I think I can at least get a 50 on my chem test which is this Wednesday. Wish me luck.
Over and out.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Annoying sayings
Some expressions don't make sense. Some expressions are stupid. Some expressions are confusing. And some expressions are just plain annoying.
.1. Better late then never.
What if the doctor arrives late and the guy is dead?
.2. Rules were meant to be broken.
Rules were made to be followed, moron. The only people who say this are people who either got caught or want someone else to get caught.
.3.The pen is mightier then the sword.
Bring it. We'll see what happens when I slice off your hands.
.4. Where there's a will, there's a way.
Yeah, I'm so sure people tell themselves this when they are trapped in a fiery fire that surrounds them when they're 18 stories up.
.5. Like looking for a needle in a haystack.
Who the hell looks for a needle in a haystack? Why did they have a needle in a barn? Why do they even have a barn? Just go buy a new needle, it's probably like, 2 cents.
.6. What's done is done.
Thanks Captain Obvious!
.7. Life is short.
Life is the longest damn thing you can experience . Shut up.
.8. If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times.
If you've told me once, you've told me once. Learn to count.
.9. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
I fail to see the worth of two birds in any bush. Or one in the hand for that matter. I hate birds.
.10. If it's not one thing it's another.
Brilliant. You truly have a genius mind. How on earth did you figure that one out?
.11. Get your goat.
I don't get it. What goat?
.12. No offence.
Saying "no offense" does not make the offensive statement non-offensive or acceptable.When somebody uses that phrase, they are tacitly saying, "I know what I am about to say will offend you but I'm going to say it anyway". So basically, they're saying, "I'm going to be rude and I don't care what you think".
.13. You just want to have your cake and eat it too.
Damn straight. Cake is delicious, of course I want to eat it.
.14. You're never fully dressed without a smile.
And yet, I appear to be clothed. I'll frown if I want to.
These are the phrases that attack me late at night and stab my mind with several forks.
.1. Better late then never.
What if the doctor arrives late and the guy is dead?
.2. Rules were meant to be broken.
Rules were made to be followed, moron. The only people who say this are people who either got caught or want someone else to get caught.
.3.The pen is mightier then the sword.
Bring it. We'll see what happens when I slice off your hands.
.4. Where there's a will, there's a way.
Yeah, I'm so sure people tell themselves this when they are trapped in a fiery fire that surrounds them when they're 18 stories up.
.5. Like looking for a needle in a haystack.
Who the hell looks for a needle in a haystack? Why did they have a needle in a barn? Why do they even have a barn? Just go buy a new needle, it's probably like, 2 cents.
.6. What's done is done.
Thanks Captain Obvious!
.7. Life is short.
Life is the longest damn thing you can experience . Shut up.
.8. If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times.
If you've told me once, you've told me once. Learn to count.
.9. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
I fail to see the worth of two birds in any bush. Or one in the hand for that matter. I hate birds.
.10. If it's not one thing it's another.
Brilliant. You truly have a genius mind. How on earth did you figure that one out?
.11. Get your goat.
I don't get it. What goat?
.12. No offence.
Saying "no offense" does not make the offensive statement non-offensive or acceptable.When somebody uses that phrase, they are tacitly saying, "I know what I am about to say will offend you but I'm going to say it anyway". So basically, they're saying, "I'm going to be rude and I don't care what you think".
.13. You just want to have your cake and eat it too.
Damn straight. Cake is delicious, of course I want to eat it.
.14. You're never fully dressed without a smile.
And yet, I appear to be clothed. I'll frown if I want to.
These are the phrases that attack me late at night and stab my mind with several forks.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Dodge ball.
My class played dodge ball today. For those of you lucky enough to not have heard of dodge ball, it's basically a game with two teams who throw rubber balls at each other. You get hit, you're out. You win when all the members of the opposing team are out. I happen to hate dodge ball, which may or may not have something to do with the fact that I'm the most un-coordinated person to walk on Earth. Like, ever. But how do people even like dodge ball? All you do is get hit in the head with a ball. It's painful. And humiliating. And full of shame.
When it comes to dodge ball, there are two kinds of people in the world: those who love dodge ball and those who hate it.
I used to have a simple, strategic game plan when playing dodge ball. It was called: hide behind someone tall (and preferably athletic) so you don't die.It was pretty clever, if I do say so myself. And it worked too, until I discovered the flaw. Because if you hide behind people for the whole game, you don't get hit and if you don't get hit, you don't get out, and if you don't get out, you stay in. And that meant I was generally the last person on my team. Now. You may not realize the seriousness of this situation so let me explain. I don't play sports. I am just not coordinated. So, when I'm the last one on my team, it means the ENTIRE team is depending on me - and I can't even get the ball over the line, let alone hit someone with it. My arms are weak as...as...as something really weak. So they're all standing on the sidelines screaming at me to throw the ball! Throw the ball! And I walk up to the line, all weak and pathetic and throw the ball as hard where it lands at the feet of the other team who then hurl it back at me. This goes on about five to seven more times before the teacher finally takes pity on me and announces the other team wins. It's very embarrassing.
So today I was like, ha, screw that game plan! It's time for Plan B! Which was called: stand in the middle of the field and don't move. So, I just stood there for awhile, practising my British accent to myself and I STILL don't get hit. And I'm just thinking to myself: I am just standing here. I am literally a damn target. How has the ball NOT HIT ME YET?
It's like I'm invincible! Which would rock if I didn't suck so much at dodge ball!
Is this just me? Because, I swear, everyone else just seems to adore dodge ball. What's the appeal? Doesn't anyone know that we are actually made of extremely brittle bones from lack of calcium and should not be touched by ANYTHING? Including dodge balls?? Ladies and gentleman, I implore you!
Oh. And we all hate that one kid who takes dodge ball way too seriously.
When it comes to dodge ball, there are two kinds of people in the world: those who love dodge ball and those who hate it.
I hate it.
My main aim in dodge ball is to GET OUT. If I get out, I don't have to play. I admit, I'm not the most team-spirited person, but this is honestly for the GOOD of the team. It's much, much better if I'm not on a team. Trust me.
I used to have a simple, strategic game plan when playing dodge ball. It was called: hide behind someone tall (and preferably athletic) so you don't die.It was pretty clever, if I do say so myself. And it worked too, until I discovered the flaw. Because if you hide behind people for the whole game, you don't get hit and if you don't get hit, you don't get out, and if you don't get out, you stay in. And that meant I was generally the last person on my team. Now. You may not realize the seriousness of this situation so let me explain. I don't play sports. I am just not coordinated. So, when I'm the last one on my team, it means the ENTIRE team is depending on me - and I can't even get the ball over the line, let alone hit someone with it. My arms are weak as...as...as something really weak. So they're all standing on the sidelines screaming at me to throw the ball! Throw the ball! And I walk up to the line, all weak and pathetic and throw the ball as hard where it lands at the feet of the other team who then hurl it back at me. This goes on about five to seven more times before the teacher finally takes pity on me and announces the other team wins. It's very embarrassing.
So today I was like, ha, screw that game plan! It's time for Plan B! Which was called: stand in the middle of the field and don't move. So, I just stood there for awhile, practising my British accent to myself and I STILL don't get hit. And I'm just thinking to myself: I am just standing here. I am literally a damn target. How has the ball NOT HIT ME YET?
It's like I'm invincible! Which would rock if I didn't suck so much at dodge ball!
Is this just me? Because, I swear, everyone else just seems to adore dodge ball. What's the appeal? Doesn't anyone know that we are actually made of extremely brittle bones from lack of calcium and should not be touched by ANYTHING? Including dodge balls?? Ladies and gentleman, I implore you!
Oh. And we all hate that one kid who takes dodge ball way too seriously.
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